Terry - Hannibal Rising doesn't call for Gong Li to do much but shiver in an alternatively vengeful or sexually repressed fashion, yet she manages this in some style and, as I've said before, some ravishing outfits.

Big Ted - yes, true, Madonna is almost always as bad on film as she was on stage. I still don't blame anyone involved for giving her a stage role, though, and I even think there is something almost heroically perverse in her determination to persevere in something to which she is so utterly unsuited.